Making it personal starts with one person: you. This isn’t easy. Especially early in your career, you’ll want to get right to the point and make your case for fear people will think you’re not smart enough or focused enough on work. As a result, you’ll hesitate to make it personal — worrying instead about seeming professional, more mature, or unaffected.
But you’ll never go as far as you want — and as your big bet requires — if you can’t make it personal. That will require you to get comfortable with people — asking what makes them tick — and to get comfortable with yourself and what makes you tick.
Making big bets requires working with people who bring expertise and capacity, but who may not be driven to this sort of work naturally.
To recruit an unlikely partner, you have to get to know them first.
Here are some of the ways to make it personal:
- Be open. Allies may come in unexpected packages, and it is important to be ready to connect with people who share your goal and passion even if they aren’t the teammates you expect.
- Stop digging. When you screw up, own it and apologize, either in person or in a way that sets the foundation for future collaboration. Doubling down can get attention, but stop digging if you want to get results.
- Build relationships through a trusted intermediary. A mutual friend can help start the conversation — and keep it going, even when times are tough.
- Be vulnerable. Opening up about your values, hopes, and fears will help others do the same.
- Start early and keep looking. Find common ground before you need it. And don’t stop until you find the right person for help.
From the book:
In the midst of a famine crisis in East Africa, I had to learn how to make a big bet personal. By forming real bonds of friendship and even confiding my own emotions on the issue, I found unlikely allies and novel avenues to address a hunger crisis. Making big bets will require you to get comfortable with people, even people with whom you disagree on almost everything. I made those kinds of connections by asking what makes people tick and getting comfortable with what made me tick.